In the 21st century, particularly in the early years, there was a great deal of interest and curiosity about the identity and belonging of minorities in America. The heart of Te’o was deeply affected by the national humiliation caused by the romantic hoax of his nonexistent girlfriend, which is often portrayed as a simple tale of catfishing but needs to be understood as something much more complex. However, a new documentary about Te’o’s ordeal, which premieres on Netflix this Tuesday, reveals that the story of his everyday life became filled with harassment, misinformation, and the rage of bot accounts before the internet’s dangers were widely recognized. It seemed as if the Te’o affair offered a warning about the dangers of the internet during a time when optimism about technology was still prevalent. In a way, it felt like a traditional story of American success turned rotten at the heart, similar to the Watergate scandal that dominated American news for four decades. If Armstrong had confessed to doping and cheating at the start of the 2013 cycling season, it would have been a confession that overshadowed the two major sporting scandals that dominated American news. These scandals were the story of the year.
Seattle native, Samoan ancestry, Manti Te’o, also known as a young man, created a Facebook profile for his online relationship with Kekua. Kekua, who was supposed to be a Stanford student, was actually a fictional character. In January 2013, this became an international news problem. However, this was just one problem among many. Te’o seemed destined to be a first-round pick in the 2013 NFL draft. He had an undefeated regular season at Notre Dame and reached new heights of excellence on the field. On the same day in December 2012, his girlfriend and grandmother, whom he claimed had died, passed away. Te’o, a Samoan-Hawaiian linebacker star at Notre Dame, became the subject of a national outpouring of sympathy. The scandal surrounding Te’o’s story became meme-fodder and continued to be discussed for almost a decade.
The transformation for Te’o was harsh and rapid. In a short span of time, he transitioned from being a worldwide laughingstock to becoming a popular athletic icon who was featured on the front page of Sports Illustrated.
To humiliate Te’o, one news report characterized the entire situation as a “bizarre Polynesian conspiracy.” Teams are interested in determining Manti Te’o’s sexual orientation, as stated by sportswriter Mike Florio. Te’o’s distress was extensively covered, analyzed, and sensationalized with an underlying current of homophobia. Many commentators speculated that Te’o might have been involved in the plot from the beginning as a means to attract national attention, portraying him as a foolish individual. On Saturday Night Live, Te’o recounted to a news anchor the moment he learned about Lennay’s death: “A few months ago, she called me and said, ‘Hey, I have some bad news – I’m deceased,’ and I responded, ‘Oh no, do you need a ride to the funeral?'” As the story spread throughout the internet.
I couldn’t understand what he explained when he first brought up the term ‘catfish’.
The phone calls and text messages that sustained the relationship were only possible thanks to the genius of Tuiasosopo, who impersonated the female voice. The first contact between Te’o and this person was made through this Facebook account. The hoaxer, Naya Tuiasosopo, who has since been revealed to be a trans woman, used stolen photos from a former high school classmate to create a Facebook profile, which fooled not only Te’o but also his friends, extended family, and a whole constellation of classmates.
It is particularly unfortunate that this series is especially interesting because it provides insight into Tuiasosopo’s state of mind as the perpetrator of the hoax. The most interesting aspect that emerges from the portrait is the profound confusion that Tuiasosopo experienced regarding her own identity when she created Lennay.
I wanted it to be reality, but it was completely selfish. It was completely selfish in the way it made me look at myself. It made me happy, but it was completely selfish. It was completely selfish in the way it made me look at myself. I knew what was wrong and right. Let’s see where this goes. Like this cute guy, let’s see where it goes. Like this cute guy, let’s see where it goes. I knew there was something inside of me that just wanted to scream and be like, ‘Why am I different?’ I was sure that there was something else, but it wasn’t necessarily the way Lennay’s profile portrayed it.
In their early 30s, Tuiasosopo and Te’o, both young Samoan individuals with a similar background, are now trying to navigate the conflicting energies of America while staying true to their important components of faith and family commitments. Interestingly, Tuiasosopo, even though she was the glue that kept Naya/Lennay and Te’o together in the story, had her own ethnicity, music tastes, interests, and personality imbued with character. It is worth noting that the internet was not such a mere tool in their connection.
She threw herself into football as a child, playing for the Raiders as her cousin and the Rams as her uncle. Tuiasosopo came from a distinguished footballing family, with her dad playing at USC. Football is often a connector to the larger culture for many Samoan-Americans.
“I merely desired to participate in football as an act of compliance, and my goal was to bring joy to my father,” she expresses in The Girlfriend Who Didn’t Exist. “However, I despise football. I lacked the audacity to boldly declare, you know what, this is my authentic self. I was burdened with an overwhelming sense of apprehension. Deep within, I genuinely believed that as someone assigned male at birth, I could never embody my true desires. It was at that moment when I resolved to pursue the experience of living as a female, even if it meant it was fabricated.”
“Him, Lennay became a rock for, because we were able to have those types of conversations,” explains Tuiasosopo. I encourage you to manage the flow and pace of your defense, and I even counseled Te’o on his defensive work by sending him messages saying things like, “babe, I like how you’re encouraging the flow and pace of your defense.” It was obvious that he was destined for great things, especially as a high school player, and he naturally experienced a different kind of love for football.
In America, the dominance of white individuals in children, as well as ethnic minorities, determined whether they would be included in schemes projected on canvas for football or sports events. It remains uncertain whether they absorbed and unfolded a rebellion against it, but unfortunately, this shared quest and shared background between Tuiasosopo and Te’o form the story that defines them.
Fa’afafine, which refers to the third gender or non-binary individuals, are a significant and firmly rooted community within the local LGBTQ population. This community, including Tuiasosopo who returned to American Samoa following the scandal, has found support.
She expresses, “I simply had to commence experiencing my existence.” “Furthermore, I desired to have the ability to live my existence as a transgender individual. [Regarding the deception], I still experience immense guilt, and occasionally I yearn for the reversal of all that occurred. However, another aspect of myself acknowledges that I have gained valuable insights into my identity and aspirations through the experiences I encountered through the persona of Lennay.”
In 2013, he felt numb all over his body before his first preseason game for the San Diego Chargers. He was drafted by the Chargers in the second round of the 2013 NFL draft and went on to have moderately successful seasons for the team. However, his public image took a hit in the following years due to the Te’o hoax. He played his last NFL game for the San Diego Chargers in 2019, after enjoying three moderately successful seasons with the team.
The therapist states, “The responsibility for what happened to you does not lie with you.” Eventually, he sought help from a therapist who advised him to forgive himself for the deception. “Now, as I am in the NFL, I find myself questioning everything. Each day was dedicated to finding ways to alleviate this anxiety, this lack of feeling, this tingling sensation. I am attempting to discover various methods to reprogram myself.” And that is what made me exceptional,” he affirms. I played with a sense of freedom, speed, and physicality. When I am on the football field, I feel invincible. The football field was my realm, you understand. The initial three years with the Chargers were akin to that. It was a stark contrast to the person I was at Notre Dame.”
In the turbulent America of the 2020s, Tuiasosopo and Te’o will finally find their own place – a quest to restart their still-young lives. Hopefully, by publicly ventilating their pain, they will inspire someone who needs inspiration, including myself.